Wednesday, June 21, 2006

Talk the Talk (or the Chameleon)

With time on my hands, I have the leisure to cast and recast, forge and reforge, write and rewrite the materials for this fellowship application. Thanks to all who have commented on my recent posts regarding this current opportunity. I am indeed going for it.

I've been a chameleon much of my life, but now is an occasion to wager my spots. Will they stick to me, or fall off like zebra stripes painted on an ass? I think of Randall Boggs from the movie Monsters, Inc. I may be opportunistic. I just hope I'm not as evil as he.

I shift yet again, taking on a new skin, honing new hues, to blend in with potential surroundings. Underneath it all, I'm still the same multi-faceted character I've always been. My greatest strength lies in drawing together disparate realms. I'm a schmoozer. Just watch me at conferences, speaking to different groups and individuals in the hallways. I've read their literature. I know the language, the issues. I can be critical. I pride myself on that, though sometimes the breadth threatens narrowness of depth.

Got to stay focused. It's not that I'm the best there is out there. I'm simply best at being me, at doing what it is I do. The trick is to present that to others with enough excitement and verve to pique their interest.

I find writing these applications, and cover letters, reworking my thoughts in new vocabulary, stiffening the sinews, summoning up the blood is a huge psychic drain, like a marathon stage performance. Can't let the energy drop until the curtain does.

Well, now back to it...

2 comments:

Prof. Me said...

I'm really excited for you on this one, AD. It seems like just what you need to keep you going right now -- a perfect opportunity arising just when you need it.

(I'd rather not imagine you as Randall, however. He was creepy, and you are definitely not that.)

undine said...

New blog look, new opportunity, new focus--all good!